Habit 4 of [[The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People]]

# Summary

Win-win is a frame of mind that looks for mutual benefit in every interaction. It treats life as cooperative, not competitive: one person's success does not need to come at another's expense. Covey sees it as the only approach that holds up in long-term relationships.

# Key ideas

- **Six paradigms of interaction**:
  - *Win-win*: both sides benefit.
  - *Win-lose*: I get my way, you do not. It relies on position, power or competition.
  - *Lose-win*: I give in to keep the peace.
  - *Lose-lose*: two win-lose people clash and both lose.
  - *Win*: I secure my own result and leave you to look after yours.
  - *Win-win or no deal*: if no solution benefits both, we agree not to proceed.
- **Abundance mentality**: The belief that there is plenty for everyone. The opposite, a scarcity mentality, sees every gain by someone else as a loss for you.
- **Five dimensions of win-win**:
  - *Character*: integrity, maturity (courage balanced with consideration) and an abundance mentality.
  - *Relationships*: enough trust in the emotional bank account to be open.
  - *Agreements*: clear results, guidelines, resources, accountability and consequences.
  - *Systems*: rewards that support cooperation. A win-lose reward system defeats win-win talk.
  - *Processes*: a way of working that reaches win-win outcomes.
- **Courage and consideration**: Win-win needs both. High courage with low consideration gives win-lose; the reverse gives lose-win.

# In practice

- Before a negotiation, write down what a win looks like for the other side as well as for you.
- Pick one relationship where you tend towards win-lose or lose-win and look for a result that works for both.
- Check whether the reward systems around you encourage competition where cooperation is needed.